Change the color of your seed, don’t pour paint on your pedals.

As we begin the new year, we have these burning desires to leave the mistakes, damaging bad habits and baggage in the pervious year. However, it’s easier said than done in terms of washing your hands of the dirt. You can force yourself to eat clean and do more reps during a set at the gym but you need to re-evaluate your mental commitment. 


I have a love/hate relationship with the phase “it’s the thought that counts.” Well yes and no, yes because it’s a great way to do something nice for someone or complete a task. No, because I could say, well I know I drank and drove but it wasn’t my intention to hit that person. Of course that’s the most extreme example but some of our thoughts and action are equally damaging to some degree. Let’s drive into a few ways of changing our thought patterns on bad behavior. 


I’m FAR from a social psychologist, but I know what has worked for me and I believe there’s a difference because studying people and understanding what your studying. I’ve serviced in the military for the last ten years since I was 17 years of age, and yes you can do that. Yes, there’s a way of thinking and solving problems in the military but contrary to popular belief we are not robots. I’ve developed my own ways of dealing with different types of individuals as the military is extremely diverse in both nationally and racially. Of course you need to be a US citizen but a lot of folks EARN their citizenship once they serve for a few years. 

With that being said, there are a few people in this world that push me to the limit just by blinking or breathing the same air as me. Those individuals don’t even need to say anything and I already disagree, if they said it was raining outside I’d go get my rain coat and call them a liar. I know this is not healthy to feel this way and that’s why I’m leaving that negative thought pattern in 2018. 

(“New Year, New Me” bullshit, let’s stop saying that.) 

Check out this blog: 


I can hear you saying to yourself “man, this guy must carry a lot of negativity around all the time.” Well no, I’m genuinely an optimist but it’s a small hand full of people that throw my emotions in a spiraling mess of anger, anxiety and pure desire to challenge them as chance I get. I hate feeling this way and carrying that hate in my heart for days at a time because of one little meaningless thing they said it didn’t say or a small laugh or moving their hands a certain ways..those Mother fuckers sieidioeiejxnebwbjc c candidxkd . I’m sorry, I saw red for a second. 


Reminder, I’m not social psychologist so I’ve researched and found a few articles I thought provided some great tips and tools. The first article by a delightfully insightful women named Arlin Cuncic. In this short article she reviews “8 Tips to Change Negative Thinking.” 

•Understanding your thinking style

•How to stop thinking negatively 

•How to cope with criticism 

•How to practice mindfulness 

•Why thought stopping doesn’t work

•Understanding thought diaries 

•Sample thought diary 

•How to complete a thought diary 

See article

Here’s a beautiful piece I came across with some wise words of wisdom on inner soul searching.

In this article, Melli Obrein crafts the levels of our self in such a way you immediately connect yourself and start the evaluation of your interior mindset. At times, we all face points of rage, being annoyed or wanted to completely run away from a person. There are several ways to help cope with negative thinking temporary but if you want or need to make a serious life perspective change you need to dig deep and dig hard. Be the flower you’d pick for your mother not the rotten potato from the market. 


“New Year, New Me” bullshit, let’s stop saying that.

Well folks, our timelines, news feeds, and every conversation is plagued by the “New Year, New Me” line. Let’s stop saying it, let’s stop encouraging it, and let us start making it happen. Often times, we find ourselves keeping those New Year hopes, dreams and habits for the better part of January. Than we burn out like the lit cigarette of some guy named Mark who keeps spilling his Jameson and pickle juice on your sleeve outside the bar.


Step one: Pour shot of Jameson

Step two: Pour shot of pickle juice

Step three: Drink Jameson

Step four: Drink pickle juice

Step five: Realize it’s not as bad as it sounds

(You can also attempt a near black out and have six of these Jagerbomb style

although not recommended.)


Why do we not keep those promises and newly formed habits alive long enough to get some sort of benefit? Why is it so hard to keep going to the gym? Why did I have that drink after nine days of not drinking? Why didn’t I just throw the trash away instead of throwing it on my floor board of my car? All these different types of why’s but we still seem to never find the answer.

Some traditional New Year’s resolutions include:

“I’m going to quit smoking.”

“I am going to start going to the gym every day.”

“I am going to start calling my mom/dad more.”

“I am going to travel more.”

You’ve most likely heard that is takes 21 days to create a new habit but as Jonathan Miltimore of “Foundation for Economic Education” wrote “Clearly, good habits don’t come easily. In the beginning, they take conscious effort and discipline. But it can be done.” We need to take the fundamental steps to set ourselves up for success and not to expect these habits to form from a week of commitment.

I understand everyone has their own lives and “busy” schedules but we make time for Facebook, Instagram, or insert social media here. In my opinion, we make excuses for the tasks we don’t want to complete or the grass we don’t want to cut well that’s horse shit. You need to make deliberate action in your day to create that new habits or break the old ones. In my personnel life, I was spending an ungodly amount of time of Facebook, it was consuming my life. The bad news of others was so fucking depressing I thought parts of my own life were just as bad little did I realize the mental confines of that 5.5 inch screen.

Take a in depth look at your life right now, write down three faults, flaws or habits you don’t like about yourself and create the circumstances for you to improve them. I know what you’re thinking, “I wonder what’s wrong with this guy and his bad habits.” Well I’ll share my lists with you and the actions I have taken or are currently using.

1. I’m spending too much time of social media

(I have logged out and deleted the apps off my phone, I kept the accounts

because I’m going to reward myself with 20 mins or so at the end of the


2. I’m not living as healthy as I should.

(I’ve started less portions during meals, and started working out a bit

more. I am not out of shape but Christmas cookies hit hard.

  3. I do not call my family members enough.                                                                 (Once a day, I will call or send a text saying something nice or let them                know I’m thinking about them.)

You don’t need to change the world or be Mr./Mrs. Universe to feel good about yourself, start small. Call someone you love, put down the phone pick up a pencil and draw or read the first five pages of a book. Think of it this way, you don’t make it to the top of a lighthouse by jumping up 10 flights of stairs. You’re forced to take it one step at a time, use that method in life and stop trying to climb a mountain with flips flops.